Passing Down Generational Trauma as a Millennial
I often hear millennials of color speaking in depth about their childhood experiences as they yearn to get clear on achieving a state of personal growth. But, in those deep conversations, I hear a lot of judgment and talk about how they are and will be completely different from their parents and will change the dynamic for their children. And, maybe they will. But, what I think is rare is talking about how difficult it is to change for the better and show up differently for the next generation, whether as a parent or simply, extended family or as a neighbor in your community.
Conversations with friends about personal growth typically come from a place of ego forcing the need to be in a better position than our friends, so while many struggle in their process of growing, they outwardly show up as the "coach" to their circle of friends. But, in the coach's place, instead of offering personal accounts of what the process looks like, a lot is calling out the toxicity, the necessary boundaries, and cutting off what doesn't serve the higher purpose. And those can be realistic acts of course correction when offered with the appropriate energy and at the right time. I don't think enough clarity exists on how much we traumatize others with our egos while on the road to healing. Many people fall in and out of their growth pattern often in healing, primarily because they believe they have time on their side. And the lack of honesty that surfaces about that part of the journey is surprising.
In standing in truth when affirming generational traumas healed, it is often forgotten that your parents and your grandparents were once upon a time in their 30s too. They struggled with adulting as much as millennials claim to be and had many uncertainties about the future. Some easily forget that the term millennial is not associated with the fountain of youth. With millennials being anywhere from 27-41, many are already in the thick of child-rearing. Some are making many of the same mistakes their parents did in real-time. They make these mistakes earnestly because that is what they have learned, and under pressure, we direct our energy to what is familiar. But, it is only in healing that we discover that we will repeat the same traumas in infinite ways until we heal the root cause of the trauma. Unfortunately, millennials aren't factoring in often enough that people from harmful emotional environments naturally create negative growth experiences for their children. Therefore, it's not enough to set a positive intention for growth and positive emotional experiences with your children; you must seek the tools to do so and the support to practice the tools in real-time.
So, if you are not choosing to heal and grow now, then when?
The Power of Emotional Neglect
Emotional neglect is generally swept under the rug and not easily eradicated in dysfunctional families, especially in families of color. There is still a stigma around seeking spiritual and clinical support for mental health issues. Because POCs have a general fear of judgment and struggle with trying so hard to remain strong in the face of so much adversity throughout our lives that we don't want to add things to create more of a negative perception of ourselves by getting treatment. Many POCs are closed to the truth about their emotions and feelings about childhood and often don't have the most accurate read on their mental landscape. But, when millennials fall into the same perception trap that their parents did, future generations fail.
We all pass on many negative aspects with ease, one of those being projection. We think everything that happens to us will happen to our offspring if we don't change the environmental conditions of their growth, but what about the emotional conditions we as parents bring to the table based on our sense of lack and fear? The mindset of scarcity always leads to dark places. Our darkest places always reveal themselves, it is simply a matter of time and the circumstances we find ourselves in at any given time.
It's sad the ways that we deny ourselves access to what could make us fundamentally better, but we excuse ourselves by comparing ourselves to what our parents had or did not have at this time in their journey. Whether you are more financially successful than your parents were at their age has no bearing on how and where your trauma will manifest. Becoming more successful faster was most likely the sacrifice in emotional growth that your parents had to make to drive your educational and financial gain. There aren't enough upgrades you can do socially, financially, or in environments that will interrupt any pattern of trauma if there isn't an emotional upgrade within.
Spiritual Help or Therapy?
The fact is so many women of color are afraid to explain the truth of their experiences for fear of alienation from their families and the need to confront their families about the trauma they experienced. That's one aspect of the Akashic Records that is unique, simply sharing the story of your experience inside your Akashic records moves the energy. Whereas more medical/clinical-based treatment requires creating a pathway to address the issues yourself. Honestly, for some of the deeper-seated emotional traumas, it's often best to understand the root causes and find a path to release by relieving the paint energetically and gaining access to tools that help you learn to direct your energy to higher vibrational spaces. The shame and guilt of deeply personal experiences connected to our families forced us inward rather than forward in our journey.
Whether you choose therapy or a more spiritually guided approach or both, if millennials expect to be better and not just a meme posted to their timeline, choosing to heal is imperative. What millennials choose now will make the most significant impact on the foreseeable future, not just for the children that they raise but the impact on the community and how they plan to leave an imprint of spirituality.
Are you ready to embark on a soulful journey to the ultimate truths, to harness light for the greater and universal good? Then schedule some time with me, and let’s see if we can travel this road together.